Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part VIII)

Living a life of indolence and gluttony will turn you into a jackass.

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part VII)

Aladdin would have been awkward if Jasmine had been drawn in a burqa.

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part VI)

Real pirate women are:

beautiful female fit models… 5ft 7in-5ft 8in [tall], size 4 or 6, no bigger or smaller. Age 18-25…, have a lean dancer body [and] have real breasts.

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part V)

In fantasy lands, narcissism is a great thing.  Real world example:

B.O. – Big Chief greets his Party: How!

Liberal Dems (in unison) – How, Chief!  How, Chief, How!

B.O. – Big Chief greets conservatives and Republicans: How!

Conservatives and Republicans (in unison) – Ugh!

B.O. – Oh Conservatives and Republicans, is that all you have to say?  Everyone else thinks I’m wonderful.

Go to 6:00 in this clip:

Also remember, in this fantasy world MSNBC has “debate about the health care bill…  ‘Left’ vs. ‘Center-Left’….

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part IV)

12 year old feral children are easy prey for 12 year old Indian girls.

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part III)

Single parents are mostly incompetent.  They are also excessively restrictive on their children.  Children with single parents, on the other hand, are extremely well adjusted for their age and can solve not only their own problems, but also their parent’s problems.

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part II)

If you outlaw spinning wheels, only evil witches will have spinning wheels.

 

Things Disney Has Taught Me (Part 1 of a series)

A jealous female can be tricked into anything.

- Captain James Hook